31 week update

Momma and the twins have reached 31 weeks!

31 weeks side view; when I look at these pics I have a hard time recalling what I looked like pre-pregnancy.

Saturday, November 24, 2012

I learned a bit to work the hospital food system. Dessert comes with lunch and dinner and I actually like about half of the desserts they serve. But like the rest of the menu, I’ve become tired of the same desserts every week. I’ve started asking for other desserts and have discovered that the cafeteria has pretty good brownies. Usually the food service person will ask what I would like when I make a face about the dessert offering and I usually reply, “Something chocolate”. So I’ve had all the various types of brownies they make and some kind of chocolate and peanut butter cake that is not that bad. I’ve learned I just need to ask about a different food option to see if they can find something I like. About once a week the cafeteria dietitian comes by to see how the food and service is going since I am a long term patient. I haven’t mentioned anything so far, but I think I will bring up the blandness of the food. They really need some ethnic food on the menu too.

I continue to have trouble sleeping at night. It really started around 30 weeks and I at first thought it was my imagination. I realize now with the huge size of my stomach it is hard to find a comfortable side sleeping position. I am trying to stay hydrated too so I get up 3-5 times a night between 11-7:15am to pee. I guess this is preparing me for when the boys arrive and need to be fed, changed, etc.  After returning to bed, it then takes me another 10 minutes to get slightly comfortable to be able to sleep. The boys moving around in my stomach also can keep me awake.  

I’ve also had some tingly pain behind my knees, especially noticeable not long after waking up. The nurses have been afraid that my blood is pooling in my legs, although my legs have not become swollen. To combat this, I have been given special compression stockings to wear. Since I can move and rotate my legs during the day, I mostly wear the stockings at night. The stockings are a bit hot because they are SO tight. They are also hard to get on and off, trying to maneuver around my large stomach, so I’ve been getting Elliot or a nurse to help me. Another instance of me having to depend on someone else to do a simple activity for me. GRRRRR.

Tonight I also watched Home Alone on TV. It is now the official start of showing Christmas movies although it is not even December. I do not consider Home Alone really a Christmas movie, but I guess the setting is Christmas time. I enjoyed that movie as an elementary age kid and recall my Uncle John always got a kick out of it too. It is hard to find funny, family friendly movies nowadays and Home Alone is defiantly one of those in today’s times.

Sunday, November 25, 2012

The morning began with a TWO HOUR non stress test monitoring of the boys. It was pure torture. The nurse put me on the monitors and the boys acted up immediately and would not stay put long enough. Elliot happened to call to get my breakfast order and when Elliot arrived with my biscuit, I was approaching the one hour mark. The nurse said “Eat your biscuit and I’ll come back to try again”. I had about a 20 minute break and then back on the monitors I went. Part of the trouble this time was Jacob kept kicking the monitor off! This is the first time/day that he has ever done that. I don’t know if he was finally strong enough or finally got tired of being monitored, but he did not want it on. I was beginning to think only Jonathan was feisty! It was during this second time on the monitors that both boys settled down enough they could get a 20 minute segment. I was about to go nuts.

Later that evening, I started have several contractions within one hour, much like the previous Sunday. So I lay on my side and drank water like a fish, slowly started to feel better and have the contractions slow down and then peed every 20 minutes for two hours. Again, much like the previous Sunday. The things I do for these boys! Sunday is also dip and weigh night; I have gained another 4 pounds. I can tell I am steadily getting bigger, but I am not sure how I am gaining that much weight. I know a good part of my weight gain is because I can't move around and work it off, but I guess my eating habits have changed more than I first thought??

Monday, November 26, 2012

Today was kinda rough because it marked my confinement of being here one MONTH!  A major emotional roller coaster for me. Sadly, I have barely left the room and have not been outside at all in a month. I have not been home in a month. I have not been to church in a month. I have not cuddled and kissed my cats in a month. I have not worked in a month. I have not cooked a meal in my home in a month. I have not been to a store or gone out to eat in a month. I have not done laundry, taken out the trash, cleaned the bathroom, gathered the mail, paid bills or done any other chores in a month. I have not been a normal person in a month. I keep wondering how long it will be before I can start to feel normal again. My life is stuck in neutral and I can’t go forward at all.

Maybe my above mentioned feelings were compounded by the fact I started looking at my insurance. I had been avoiding it due to the stress of thinking about how much is me just laying here costing us every day and how much of that cost will we have to pay.  The hospital has several case workers that help people with insurance, being someone to talk to and other issues patients may have. Before becoming pregnant, Elliot and I signed me up for disability insurance. Basically, after the HUGE pile of paperwork is submitted, we should get two checks, one for my being on bed rest and the other for being disabled for delivery. When we signed up, the insurance guy said the insurance people referred to disability insurance for younger women as baby insurance. Since I have been on bed rest so long, we and the case worker checked in on how and when I would need to apply for my disability insurance. Basically, no paperwork can be done or submitted until I am released from the hospital. Boo. A huge hassle to deal with combined with recovering from surgery and bed rest and learning to parent twins. I also looked at my regular insurance and saw that the last submitted bills for me were from my doctor appointment on 10/26, so I guess the hospital is also waiting to submit bills on me until they release me. I was hoping to see at least a few days submitted so I could estimate how much this will all be. Of course I am a cheaper patient than two babies in the NICU, but the cost of all of this is alarming. Now that I’ve been here longer and every day the boys are less in danger, I can’t decide if it would be better for me mentally and physically and monetarily to deliver now and have them in the NICU a few days or to keep ‘em cookin’ and me on bed rest and less possible days in the NICU.

A bright spot in my day was a visit from Jan. She was very happy and brought me some Christmas antlers to wear. I wore them for a bit.  I admire how she can be happy with all the craziness going on with Mama right now. I pray it will be resolved soon and the doctors figured out how to make Mama comfortable and happy.

Another bright spot was receiving flowers from my Aunt Julie and Uncle Peter. It was a pretty arrangement with daises, yellow roses and some sort of blueish flower I can’t identify.  Since all the flowers people had brought or sent me have died, it was nice to have something fresh and alive again in my room.

Pretty floral arrangement with a picture frame on front. You insert a small picture where the "sweet dreams!" phrase is located. It's attached to a cup like structure to hold the flowers.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Today was a pretty quiet day. I had a long visit from Dr. Wright and the OBGYN nurse Burris about how far I have come. They cannot believe I have made it this far-me either. I think they check in now mainly to assess my mental health, which most days is pretty good, considering my circumstances.

In the morning, Clara stopped by to chat and bring a gift for the boys. Clara works here in the administrative part of the hospital. She brought two matching outfits from Gymboree with the cutest raccoon design on them. Unfortunately, I forgot to get a picture of them. I now have a good mix of matching and non-matching clothes for the twins. Yes, I plan to dress them alike sometimes-they are twins after all. But I also realize they are individuals and depending on how much they look alike I may need to dress them differently to tell the difference.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Borrowed from:http: //performingsongwriter.com/charlie-brown-christmas/

Nothin' starts the Christmas season for me like a Charlie Brown Christmas on TV...in November. 

Merry Christmas!

Wednesday turned out to be a pretty busy day. While waiting to be put on the monitors I worked some on school stuff. I am desperately trying to get done with my lesson plans just in case the boys come. I like to leave things in a completed sense, but that is not working well in my current condition. I am still bitter about leaving my library in a disheveled stated and not being able to meet/interview my sub. Sigh. I do need to get over it.

Once they put me on the monitors, the boys did an excellent job of accelerating their heartbeats. They do not technically have to do this until 32 weeks, but it’s good they are getting in the habit of it now. Grow babies grow!!

I also had several visitors. Joan and Angel visited me again. Joan brought me some fresh blueberries and strawberries to munch on. I do appreciate how much they have visited me. It’s hard some days know that the world carries on without you and you are totally out of the loop. Mrs. Miller, my school’s PTO president, brought her son and another PTO mom, Mrs. Johnson, and her daughter to visit me. It was such a blessing to see the kids again; I do miss being around kids all day and teaching them. We had a nice long visit and they also brought some small gifts to cheer me up. I certainly do not expect gifts, but it is nice to know people are thinking about you. It was not until the end of our visit that Mrs. Miller mentioned that she had to be on home bed rest for 3 weeks at the end of her pregnancy. I’ve now met someone who has survived bed rest and knows how hard it can be. Makes me appreciate her visits all the more.

A Christmas fern from the Johnsons and a Willow Tree Angel of Prayer from the Millers. I will see if I can turn the snowman figure into a Christmas ornament for next year and keep the Willow Tree figure to remind me of the many wonderful people around the country that have been praying for me and the boys. 

Thursday, November 29, 2012

One of the best things to happen today was that because I am so close to 32 weeks and have continued to be stable since I first checked in, the doctors agreed to allow me to have day room privileges and short wheelchair rides, but only on the 4^th floor in case I have an emergency. I was shown the day room; it’s quite small and cluttered with furniture. There is a large sink area, a very large couch and two gaudy pink recliners. There is also a magazine rack on the wall and a window with a view of the mountains. I had a short wheelchair ride just to get out. It was dark by the time Elliot arrived, but I was desperate to see the hallway and just something different so I took a ride anyway. I looked out the huge window that overlooks Hendersonville road and leads to I-40. All I could see was long lines of headlights and lights from various businesses in the dark, but it was so nice to see something other than my 3 walls and the window with the view of a brick wall. I cannot wait for the day I can go outside again.

Today I finished up and emailed my lesson plans to my interim sub. This should give her 3 weeks worth and get her prepared and ready for the month of December. Besides giving her the formal lesson plans, I also write detailed notes and try to be as clear as possible. Sometimes I think I may be going a bit over board. I also emailed Ginny, my principal, about my health status and to ask her about January and February lesson plans. I am not trying to be reclusive or distant about telling my co workers about my and the boys progress, but there is not much to report except I am still pregnant, we have no idea when I will deliver and I am trying not to lose my mind. Ginny wrote back and said I could write the lesson plans for my sub if I wanted to, but it would not be expected. I think I may let the sub create the lesson plans for January and February. Partly because I will be extremely busy once the babies are here and the plans I would like to do, I cannot do. In January, I like to read the 12 NC Children’s Picture Book Award nominees and then have the children vote. It’s a great lesson plan that all grades can do and participate, makes for easy lesson planning and exposes the students to current children’s literature. Because I have been laid up here, the book orders I had hoped to place in November once we had the fundraising and PTO contributions in have not been ordered, thus I have not been able to purchase the 12 nominees. It bothers me that the kids will not know some of the latest literature, but what can I do?

Our good friends from our WCU days, Melanie and Cody, came to visit in the evening. They have an adorable daughter, Madelyn, who has just turned one and Melanie is expecting again! Cody has a doctor’s conference at the Grove Park Inn and for the past few years we have had them stay with us at our home while Cody attends the conference and Mel and I spend some good girl time together. On the Saturday of the conference, we also invite our other good WCU friends, Pam and Mike and we enjoy a good visit, Elliot and I make dinner and often end the night playing games. Originally, Elliot and I were not going to be in town because of Megan’s wedding on Saturday, but that of course is no longer happening. It was so wonderful to see them again and see little Maddie. It was amusing to watch Elliot watch and interact with Maddie. Maddie knew that there was a certain food item in her diaper bag that she wanted and she was determined to get it. Mel and Cody kept trying to distract her with other items from the bag and sometimes it worked, but eventually Maddie would remember that her special food item was still in the bag. Elliot was just fascinated that A) you can distract the baby easily and B) Maddie still recalled, repeatedly, that her food item was in the diaper bag. I’m no expert either, but Elliot has a lot to learn about babies and toddlers. Besides a fun visit, they gifted us a beautiful poinsettia to dress up the room and a gigantic bag of wipes and a large bottle of Dreft detergent. It was so much stuff that the bag’s handles ripped and Elliot had to use both arms to carry when he left. Oh baby!

 Beautiful poinsettia gets me in the Christmas spirit.

 Friday, November 30, 2012

Today started off slow and I was not happy about that. Because the MFMU is quite full right now and I am further along than some patients and relatively stable, I get put at the end of the list when it comes to having the nurse come in and do their daily checklist on me. It really stinks on shower and bed linen change day. I look forward to my every other day showers since some days I feel like I can smell myself and the shower lets me feel normal for a few minutes. I hesitate to get involved in working on this blog, reading or other projects because I will be interrupted at any moment for 20+ minutes. Maybe if I did start one of those activities it would work to actually get them in the room to see me.

They barely left the room when the pet therapy dog arrived. This one was a Dalmatian; I was so excited because I have never petted a Dalmatian. Brodie was a very friendly dog and hopped right up on the bed with me! I really do enjoy the pet therapy visits.

Not long after the Dalmatian left, Jan and Angel came by to visit. Jan discussed her upcoming right shoulder surgery. At first, we thought she had only pulled a muscle and the area was just very sore. But after continued pain, she had an x-ray which showed the muscles and ligaments in her shoulder were straining and coming apart. When her doctor explained that she would need surgery in January to repair it, she couldn’t drive for 10 days after and then 4-6 weeks of recovery and therapy. When she heard that news, she apparently had a crying breakdown. Jan explained to the doctor about me on hospitalized bed rest with twins coming and that her mother was sick and in and out of the hospital over an hour away. The doctor took great pity on her and scheduled her for surgery on 12/7, over some athletes who have been waiting over a month to have their surgery done. I am grateful to the doctor because although Elliot plans to take some time off once the twins are born, he will have to go back to work and I will still be in the process of regaining my strength from bed rest and a C-section. Jan is now relieved and praying the boys come after she is allowed to drive again on December 17th and once she has some of her recovery period done. Quite frankly, I don’t know if I will be able to hold on that long. I want the boys to have more time to cook, but I was hoping to be home for Christmas. Guess we’ll see what happens.

Off and on all day I had been calling either Mom or Megan to find out when the rehearsal for the wedding would be going on. Elliot had brought me our laptop with Skype downloaded on it and we were going to try it out in preparation of Saturday being the big wedding day. When Susan, one of the bridesmaids, called to tell us to boot up the computer and try to connect, I was so nervous, but excited. The Skype worked beautifully and Susan yelled to Megan that it had connected. Megan knelt down in front of the computer screen and we both started to cry. I was so relieved that Skype was working because Megan had been told the church’s wireless connection was not that strong. I was able to watch the whole rehearsal practiced twice and chatted with mom and dad a bit too. The connection kicked us off a couple times, but Susan and Mileva, the other bridesmaid, were right there to reconnect.  I just hope it works as well or better for the wedding.

I went to bed praying to God for it to stop pouring on our family. I know life has its ups and downs and when I was first admitted to the hospital it felt like it was starting to "rain" on us. The rain was tolerable, but increased steadily when Mama started having issues and then turned to a downpour gully washer with Jan’s upcoming surgery and me having to miss my sister’s wedding. Each of those incidents by themselves is tough to handle, but having to cope with all that feels like you are in a monsoon and can’t see your hand in front of you. All I can pray anymore is for guidance and for the downpour to stop.